Blood simply means our ties with our family members.

And bond means the connections that we build in the outer world.

I sometimes ask myself this question

If I have to choose, which one I will pick?

And I always fall into a dilemma when choosing between these two. Because the answer keeps changing every day.

We are taught to take care of our own family. Because on a primal level, we share the same blood. That means we need to be there for them no matter what.

But what if we don’t share the same bond?

What if we hate each other? And can’t stand to be at the same dinner table together.

Do I still have to choose them?

While on the other hand, the bond that we create with strangers is unique in a sense. Since they have no reason to be with us.

Yet sometimes they choose to stay willingly.

Unlike family, who have to stick together simply because they share the same family name.

But do you know who hurts us the most?

Family.

Why?

Because we have expectations from them. Since we share the same bloodline we think of them as one with ourselves. And every time they disappoint us because they think we won’t be able to leave them because of this invisible string that is binding us together.

Strangers on the other hand can never hurt us.

But they do, don’t they?

How?

When they choose to stay. Be with us for a significant amount of time, we let them in. We start to think of them as our own.

In our hearts, we start to believe we are a sort of family. The concept of family that is taught to us as a kid comes into play even here.

Be it your best friend to betrayed you, or your girlfriend who cheated. Once you practically thought of them as your own blood. And that is why you couldn’t see it coming and hurt you the most.

When we let someone completely in, we make ourselves vulnerable to their attacks.

The debatable solution is to create boundaries since we need both of these relations to survive in the world.

You can say that we have to at some point let someone in. And at some point that boundary has to drop.

And I agree.

Let them in but never let them touch your core. As long as you keep your individuality intact, you will be able to see them from a practical viewpoint. Never let them influence you or any of your thinking or actions.

This is why I think what a true boundary should be. Talk to them, listen to them, laugh with them.

But never let them decide things for you.

Because if you do, then unknowingly you will start to rely on them and wish they do the same.

This will create expectations.

And we all know what happens when expectations aren’t met.

But to directly answer the top question

I will always choose blood before bond since they are easier to predict and take action when needed.

What about you? Do let me know in the comments!

Thank you for staying until the end!